Funkalicious

I know a guy that has a tattoo that is scarily similiar to my face here.

Guess who'sssss backkkkkkkk

India is about as fun as a roller coaster full of razor blades and salt licks.

Ok, maybe not that bad, but pretty damned close. I may be bashing the country a little too hard due to a 24 hour period but take a quick minute to read my trials and the six and a half days prior to it can't overshadow the misery I went through.

Another couple, my wife and I are scheduled to leave Delhi (also know to some as "New" Delhi) at 12:55 am. At no point did any of us sleep for more than six hours and this was the case for Saturday. We woke up around 6:30 am, had a wedding, danced around like..... crazed Indian folks, then drove to the airport.

At this point the only thing wrong with me is a little joint discomfort from dehydration and some Delhi Belly (diareha)(sp?). The Delhi belly isn't atomic so it isn't really causing any discomfort. This is all about to change.

We board the plane and and starting to take of when we hear this loud "sscchhboooom" followed by two more. I just happened to look over to the wing and see a huge ball of fire blow out of the engine. We have lift off and about 15 seconds later another one and this time it's an even bigger ball of fire. The other couple with us is sitting next to the other wing and tell me that there is a ton of liquid pouring out of it. Later we find out that they were dumping jet fuel because we were too heavy to land - WTF.

So we land and deboard. It is roughly 3:00 am at this point. All of a sudden my Delhi Belly has made a turn for the worse. I get to an airport bathroom, which is absolutely disgusting - not to mention there are more "holes" than toilets. You either stand/squat and crap or use the toilet. I always waited for a toilet.

Now I'm starting to feel sick to my stomach annnnnnnd then I throw up. Yummmmy. I come out of the bathroom having extracted from both ends to find out that they aren't going to fix the plane and are going to see if they can board us onto another one. An hour goes by and they finally tell us that they can't board us and are taking us to a hotel - I've thrown up at least 3-4 times and crapped a couple times in that hour.

It takes them roughly 2 hours to get everyone loaded up on to a bus and sent to the hotel. I stayed at the very back of the line because once I got into a crowd I would overheat and ....... well you don't need to have me describe it anymore.

During this time my wife and the other couple are frantically trying to get us on ANY flight out of there but in India they are about as helpful as a paralyzed donkey. Here I am as sick as I have ever been, my wife is crying because she's stuck in this hell hole and because there is nothing she can do about me being sick. We are just getting onto the bus when I am hit with a extremly violent bout of barfitis. I blew blood vessels around my eyes, forehead and my nose. I seriously look like I have been in a fight.

This last extraction of the stomach made the bus wait a couple more minutes - and just as they got me on board and the driver closed the door an American Airlines agent came running up, knocking on the door.

Air India was leaving at 7:30 am to JFK with a layover in London and had room for more people. Ahhhhh I have walked through the valley of death to see the glorious light, everything in the world was good again - right?

I'm not sure why but the vomiting ceased but the migrane came, bad. By the time we get on to the plane and take off we have been up for more than 24 hours, I have have lost more fluid than my body can hold and now I can't sleep because of the pain I'm in from the headache. The Delhi Belly symptoms don't help the migrane either.

Suffice to say I didn't sleep more than 30 minutes until we got home last night at 1:30 am. My stomach is a wreck but my body is starting to feel better.

In the next musing I will write about the good times, which there were plenty of, but the most recent events always trump the past.

Today's the day

Meghan and I leave for India today - in a few hours. We are very excited and I really look forward to the time there. Pictures to be provided upon a "safe" arrival back home. :-)

The Man B-Dawk

If you have 5 minutes of your life to devote to anything - use it to watch my man B-Dawk

Eagles Video

most guys do a craptacular job at making highlight video's that go with music, this guy didn't.

awesome (though, not enough Dawkins) :-)

Glory Days

This is a couple of months old, and the video quality sucks, but it's Lito Sheppard winning the game for us against the Cowboys..... ahhh the memories